A pregnancy journal

Getting pregnant and then being pregnant has been an incredible journey. I have read and learnt a lot, visited quite a few doctors and now a midwife. I want to share what I have learnt, so that it can help other women challenge the norm and look within, for their own wisdom to come to the fore.

Getting pregnant was not as easy as I had expected. It was hard work to figure out when in my cycle I was fertile and then doing something about it. I read Toni Weschler’s wonderful book, Taking Charge of your Fertility. This book deals with natural birth control and pregnancy achievement. I learnt about checking cervical fluid, taking my temperature every morning and then recording the thermal shift that occurred to show that ovulation had happened. Also checking the cervical position that changes to a high, open and soft position to indicate fertility. I also bought a kit that you pee on in the morning and it tells you when you are about to be most fertile.
There is a great website called fertiltyfriend.com, where you can enter all the information and it presents it in a graph format, that allows charting your cycle.

Once the long awaited pregnancy happened, I started looking for a doctor that I could trust. Eight and half months later, I think I might have found someone! The two South Asian doctors that I visited, were very interested in my business. Apparently pregnancy is big business and doctors get paid $15,000 per patient. Usually the more complications and interventions earn the doctors more money. Also they are very scared of being sued, so they like a lot of testing done on patients. I am going to be over 35 at the time of giving birth, so my first doctor recommended genetic counseling, followed by C.V.S, Blood tests and Amniocentesis. I did not do either C.V.S. or Aminocentesis due to their invasiveness. The doctors were also against pregnant women, reading books. For me if a doctor tells me not to read about my condition, it makes me wonder what information the doctor is trying to conceal. Power is knowledge and the more knowledge one has, the more one can challenge wrong diagnosis and unnecessary interventions.

Naomi Wolf’s book Misconceptions was an eye opener about the American medical establishment, and how powerless pregnant women are made to feel by doctors and nurses in a hospital setting.

Ina May Gaskin’s book, Guide to Childbirth, was how I wanted my child to be born. She is a community midwife that has set up a farm, in Southern Tennessee, where women give birth vaginally. Birth is seen as ecstatic and strengthening. The women know that it is better to keep their senses alive if they are to experience the true wisdom and power that labor and birth have to offer.

“Birthing is so integral with life-so common-that choices surrounding it often get relegated to chance. We tend to go along with what everyone else is doing, assuming that must be for the best. Living in a technological society we tend to think that the best of everything is the most expensive kind available. This is generally true, whether we are taking about cell phones, cameras, cars or computers. When it comes to birth, it ain’t necessarily so.”

But my search continued I was in India during my second trimester and visited a doctor. She was OK. But after, I heard she had given an acquaintance an epistomy that required a long recovery time, i was not so keen. I visited a fancy hospital “the cradle” that looked like a five star hotel but lacked what I was looking for, which was a natural approach to childbirth. In Delhi, I found a book by Diane Smith, Birthing with Dignity. This book was a handbook for training community level midwives (Dais) and health workers, published by Jagori. Diane Smith is a midwife based in Canada. Smith talks about her experience.

“Talking with these women (Indian) about childbirth was an energizing initiation into my presentation of “natural childbirth”, a unique perspective that had emerged from the women’s movement in North America. In the course of the interaction I recognized that women want the opportunity to birth in peace, with the comfort of their traditional cultural wisdom, and be respected for their power in giving birth. It was also obvious that ..times are changing and medical institutions and professionals are beginning to assume superiority over traditional wisdom, the work of the Dai, and a women’s innate ability to give birth naturally.”

I know their can be a lot of problems during pregnancy, like a cervix that does not close, requiring a stitch to keep the baby in, or placenta previa or gestational diabetes or repeated miscarriages or just not being able to get pregnant, a.k.a. undiagnosed infertility. And I highly recommend medical interventions that can help resolve those issues. Also women without partners or lesbians and gays that want children, I would wish for all for them to take advantage of the best of medical treatments, like I.U.I or I.V.F or surrogate pregnancy or adoptions, to be able to give birth if they really want too. In my own case, if I need interventions, like pain medications or emergency c-section I am open to it as along as I, feel that it is necessary for having a healthy baby.

Ann Tyler’s book, Digging to America, is an interesting novel about Americans adopting Korean babies.

At the seventh month I asked my Ob-gyn if I should be taking Lamaze classes. She was dismissive and said it was a waste of money, since insurance did not cover it, and all her patients came asking her the same three questions. Doctor will you put me on an I.V., Yes of course she responded. Also the doctor would give her patients an enema before giving birth, so that they would not be embarrassed when shit came instead of the baby, and put eye drops into the baby's eyes to protect against infections within a mother's birth canal.

I decided to take a hospital visit to see what the maternity ward was like. At the visit we first visited a birthing center on the 11th floor, that was homely, comfortable with a double bed, large chairs for the family to sit on. And a Jacuzzi that made me want to jump right in. The birthing center was where, women that did not want pain medications like epidurals could give birth. There were only a couple of doctors and midwives who believed in the birthing center births. I took the list home and realized it was still not too late. We also saw the 12th floor which had the triage, where you first went and a nurse checked to see if you were dilated enough. If you were not you are sent home, if you are, you go to a labor and delivery room, after giving birth you go to a post-partum room to recover. There is a nursery where the mothers can send their newborns if they want to rest.

I called some of the midwives and doctors from the list of the birthing center and went and visited them. I decided on a practise that had a doctor and midwife. The midwife delivers in the birthing center. She asked me to take enriched Lamaze classes. I found the four classes quite useful, with a lot of information on what actually happens in the hospital, how to determine if it is time to go to the hospital, natural pain control, moving around during labor and breathing through contractions.

The goal of Lamaze is to remove the fear, tension and pain around childbirth. The idea is to use Psychophroplaxis as an aid to pain relief instead of medications.

1. Relax
2. Knowledge
3. Imagery
4. Postition
5. Concentration
6. Massage
7. Focal point
8. Breathing
9. Meditation

A baby is ready to come out between the 38th and 42nd week of pregnancy. You need to go to the hospital when you have five contractions, lasting for a minute, within an hour.

Lamaze institute for normal birth advocates the followers practices

1. Labor begins on its own
2. Freedom of movement throughout labor
3. Continuous labor support
4. No routine interventions
5. Non-supine (e.g. Upright or side-lying) positions for birth
6. No separation of mother and baby after birth

There are four stages of labor

Early Labor which can last for a few days to a few hours. The woman is relatively comfortable. Dilation is 3-4 centimeters. Pinkish vaginal discharge increases. Its best to stay home at this stage. Once the contractions became stronger so that you cannot talk yourself through them use relaxation and breathing exercises.

Active Labor contractions continue to became longer and stronger, until they are 3 minutes apart and last a minute or more. Time from two to six hours, cervix effaces and dilates to about 8 centimeters. Women get serious and focused.

Transition the cervix finishes dilating and begins to transition from opening to pushing. The phase lasts an hour with contractions powerful and efficient.

Birth or pushing- the baby makes its way down through the pelvis and the birth canal. This stage can last from 15 min to several hours. Most women get an urge to bear down. The urge to push gets stronger as the baby descends. Just before the baby is born you may feel a burning, stinging stretching sensation at the vaginal opening. A sign that you are almost there.

Signs of Labor

Obvious
1.water breaks, you need to call the care provider and let them know the time, amount, color and odor. It should be clear, with no odor. A smell is not good.
2. Bloody show
3. Mucous plug

Not so obvious signs are low backache, nausea, diarrhoea, excessive heat, excessive cold, nesting

Natural methods of inducing labor

1. Castor oil 2 tablespoons. It works as a laxative to get the systems going.
2. Acupressure- massage therapists know where on the foot they can massage so labor can be started.
3. Nipple stimulation
4. Sex

I will keep adding to this information as soon as I learn more. I hope it is helpful to all those that are pregnant or plan to became pregnant soon.

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